Juicy. Dirty. Joyful. Scary.

“Don't strew me with roses after I'm dead. When death claims the light of my brow, no flowers of life will cheer me: instead you may give me my roses now!” -Thomas F. Healey

For many, dying is life’s greatest fear. I’ve never been afraid of death. I certainly don’t want to suffer a long, painful or gruesome death but the whole idea of dying never bothered me. I even worked at funeral home while in college. I didn’t seek out the position but as it happened, it never troubled me and it was a good job.

During my teacher training, my teacher asked us eager yogis: “What do people fear the most?” Without missing a beat, my peers responded with a resounding: “Death.” I said: “Failure.” Instead of fearing death, I’ve been afraid of life. I have been navigating numbly through this world with caution, assessing risk and asking all the right questions to avoid failure. I’ve been so busy protecting myself from failure that I am flunking life. Even in my asana practice, my fear of failure manifests itself physically. I have built up a protective shell on my back which creates added difficulty in many of the poses. My teacher calls me a little armadillo!

Because death is inevitable I’ve always thought: “What does it matter?” But it does matter…every year, every month, every week, day and minute. According to Buddha, we are responsible for our own happiness or misery which is dictated by our actions here and now. We are the architects of our own faith.

So consider living and celebrating all the juicy, dirty, joyful, scary, delightful and uncertain moments of life. Speak from the heart, tell the truth, and open up to the possibilities…even if it is terrifying…even if you risk defeat, embarrassment or a wounded heart. The risk otherwise is far greater. I’ve never feared death, but I think now I should.

“If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood. I'd type a little faster.” –Isaac Asimov